I sit here at Panera alone this Saturday morning while Ben entertains 4 ladies at our house. You heard that right, the past several weeks I've lost Ben to these women because they have had meeting after meeting after meeting. They are the other therapists that Ben is partnering with to share office space for his private practice. Of course, this may be nothing compared to the night and weekend hours he will spend apart from me when he starts seeing clients.
We have somehow managed throughout the course of our marriage not to become workaholics. Unfortunately, it seems inevitable that, to take that leap of faith we've both committed to in pursuing careers out of who we are, this may have to be a chapter in our story. Ben will soon be balancing working a full-time job with starting a private practice. Someday, I will be balancing having a home staging business with being a full-time mom.
Ultimately, our goal is to both be working part-time with full-time incomes because we are so awesome at what we do. Then we will both be able to play a big part in raising our future children (ScreamFree, of course).
My New Goal
This may sound silly, but I've been thinking a lot lately about how much I admire people who seem truly happy and content about where they are. It seems that in life we are constantly looking forward to the next step... kindergarten, junior high, high school, turning 16, college, turning 21, finishing school, starting a career, getting married, buying a house, getting a puppy, having kids, getting those kids out of the house, becoming a grandparent, retiring, traveling.
I think I tend to miss out on the good stuff because I'm so anxious about the next step. I want to love the city and house I live in, the number in my bank account, the things I have, the mistakes I'm making and learning from, the point I'm at in my faith, and the people I share life with right now.
That would be an accurate description of the early anniversary present I gave Ben yesterday. I had this brilliant idea when looking for a gift for Ben on the internet last week that I would give him a piece of art and that could become a tradition (I heart traditions by the way!). The problem was that I may have chosen a piece of art that was a lot more me than him. He likes it, but you could see in his eyes that he saw this as an "excuse" for me to get something that I really wanted. Back to the drawing board I suppose...
I can honestly say that this past year of marriage with Ben has been the toughest yet. We both grew and challenged ourselves, and in doing so our marriage, more than ever before! We stopped being content in life and took leaps of faith.
I can also say with absolute certainty that Monday when we celebrate 7 yrs. together that I love and want this man on a level I never thought possible. Every single day he challenges me with his thoughts, his actions, and of course his humor. When I said "I do" I had no idea the adventures in life we would share. I love where we are right now and where we're going. I love you, Ben. Happy Anniversary, baby!
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